Oct. 03, 1960
30 min.
CBS TV Network

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Floyd Lawson The Andy Griffith Show

Floyd Lawson

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  Played by:
Howard McNearHoward McNear
Although Los Angeles native Howard McNear had a long career on radio and in films, he will forever be ...

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Floyd Lawson Quotes

06x10 - Aunt Bee on TV Season 6 / Episode 10: - Aunt Bee on TV

Goober Pyle: Did you know she's been walkin' all over town wearin' it?
Floyd Lawson: Yeah. It's mink!
Goober Pyle: Yeah, she told me. They're vicious little animals, ya know.
06x03 - Malcolm at the Crossroads Season 6 / Episode 3: - Malcolm at the Crossroads

Ernest T. Bass: [yelling at Malcom Merriweather] I'm warning you! Now today is Thursday. If you're still here on... what's the day after Thursday?
Floyd Lawson: Uh Friday.
Ernest T. Bass: Right. If you're still here on Friday, which is the day after Thursday, I'll WHOOP the fire outta you.
05x05 - Aunt Bee's Romance Season 5 / Episode 5: - Aunt Bee's Romance

Andy Taylor: Well, as Mark Twain said, everybody complains about the weather but nobody does anything about it.
Floyd Lawson: Did he say that?
Andy Taylor: Mm-hmm.
Floyd Lawson: I thought Calvin Coolidge said that.
Andy Taylor: No, no Floyd, Calvin Coolidge didn't say that.
Floyd Lawson: What'd Calvin Coolidge say?
03x11 - Convicts-at-Large Season 3 / Episode 11: - Convicts-at-Large

Floyd Lawson: Maude! Al! If those hamburgers are ruined, I won't be responsible!
03x11 - Convicts-at-Large Season 3 / Episode 11: - Convicts-at-Large

Deputy Barney Fife: [Floyd and he have run out of gas, and in walking about looking for some have arrived at a mountain cabin belonging to wealthy Mr. O'Malley. Barney decides to shout to see if anyone's home] O'Malley! Charlie! It's me, Barney Fife!
Floyd Lawson: [Aghast] You shouldn't call a rich man by his first name!
Deputy Barney Fife: [to Floyd] The Bigger they are, the nicer they are.

Deputy Barney Fife: Hey, Chuck!
02x28 - The Bookie Barber Season 2 / Episode 28: - The Bookie Barber

Sheriff Andy Taylor: You could put a sign in the window saying 'Two Chairs - No Waiting.'
Floyd Lawson: Two chairs... and I've got the magazines to swing it!
Unknown Episode Unknown Episode:

Andy Taylor: Floyd.
Floyd Lawson: What's the matter?
Andy Taylor: My sideburns.
Floyd Lawson: Your sideburns - what's the matter with your sideburns?
Andy Taylor: Why, they're both even.
Floyd Lawson: Well, I'll be dogged. How'd that happen?
Andy Taylor: I declare, Floyd, I believe you're getting the hang of it. And looka there - they're the right length and everything.
Unknown Episode Unknown Episode:

Floyd Lawson: [while looking at himself in the mirror] Wretch, wretch! Deceitful wretch!
Unknown Episode Unknown Episode:

Goober Pyle: Floyd made the diagnosis.
Andy Taylor: Floyd, what do you know about whiplash?
Floyd Lawson: What do you mean? A barber does a lot of work around the back of the neck.
Unknown Episode Unknown Episode:

Floyd Lawson: If I keep this up I'll probably end up with a barber's claw from holding the shears all day.

Previous: Goober Pyle Next: Helen Crump
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