3x04 Blood, Devastation, Death, War and Horror
First Aired: Nov. 09, 1972 on BBC One
Summary: The Sketches:
The man who speaks in anagrams
Life and death struggles
Mary recruitment office
The man who makes people laugh uncontrollably
Army captain as clown
Gestures to indicate pauses in a televised talk
Main Characters in this Episode
'Life and Death Struggles' Narrator: Here you see some English comic actors engaged in a life or death struggle with a rather weak ending. This is typical of the zany madcap world of the irresistible kooky funsters. The English pantomime horse wins and so is assured of a place in British history, and a steady job at a Merchant Bank. Unfortunately, before his pension rights are assured, he catches bronchitis and dies. Another victim of the need to finish these shows on time.
Title Card: ETH NED
Merchant Banker: What is my incentive to give you the Pound?
Mr Ford: Well, the incentive is to make the orphans happy.
Merchant Banker: Happy? You quite sure you've got this right?
Mr Ford: Yes, lots of people give me money.
Merchant Banker: What, just like that?
Mr Ford: Yes.
Merchant Banker: Must be sick. Uh, I don't suppose you could give me a list of their names and addresses.
Merchant Banker: [on phone] Hello? Ah, Mr. Victim, yes, I'm glad to say I've got the go-ahead to lend you the money you require, yes. Uh, we will, of course, need as security the deeds to your house, of your aunt's house, of your second cousin's house, of your wife's parents' house, and of your granny's bungalow - and we will, in addition, need a controlling interest in your new company, uh, unrestricted access to your private bank account, the deposit into our vaults of your three children as hostages, and a full legal indemnity against any acts of embezzlement carried out by any members of our staff during the normal course of their duties.
- Goof (crew or equipment visible): During the "Merchant Banker" sketch, a crew member's head is visible when Terry Jones falls through the trapdoor.