Sep. 13, 1996
30 min.
CBS TV Network

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Debra Barone Everybody Loves Raymond

Debra Barone

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  Played by:
Patricia HeatonPatricia Heaton
While studying acting in New York with drama teacher 'William Esper' (qv), Heaton made her Broadway ...

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Debra Barone Quotes

03x05 - The Visit Season 3 / Episode 5: - The Visit

Debra Barone: [to Lois] I want you to help or at least *want* to help. I want to be more like... like her!

Robert Barone: Like who?
Ray Barone: Like Mom.
Robert Barone: [disgusted] Why?
03x04 - Getting Even Season 3 / Episode 4: - Getting Even

Ray Barone: Come on, what do you - don't be such a bad sport.
Debra Barone: What if you were me? What would you do?
Ray Barone: I would laugh at all my husband's jokes, strip off my clothes, have my way with him and then put on TV.
Debra Barone: Keep dreaming.
Ray Barone: I would - I'd be so naughty. I might even talk dirty, oh!
03x04 - Getting Even Season 3 / Episode 4: - Getting Even

Ray Barone: I know, you're mad at the jokes.
Debra Barone: You just - you just couldn't stop, could you, Ray?
Ray Barone: I was killing them, it was great. That box falling apart, that was the best thing that could've happened. That broke the ice.
Debra Barone: You embarrassed me.
Ray Barone: What? No! It was all fun. Come on, I told you, people thought that we did it on purpose.
Debra Barone: I felt humiliated.
Ray Barone: Don't feel humiliated.
Debra Barone: Don't tell me how to feel.
Ray Barone: But you're wrong.
Debra Barone: There's no right or wrong, this is how I feel. You can not tell me not be humiliated, I just am.
Ray Barone: Okay, all right, feel humiliated.
Debra Barone: I don't anymore.
Ray Barone: Okay, all right...
Debra Barone: Now I'm just angry. I mean I can't believe - I can't believe you - It's bad enough what you did to me tonight, but you don't even care how I feel about it. All you care about is how well you did, you laugh-whore
Ray Barone: Maybe you should... go back to being humiliated.
03x04 - Getting Even Season 3 / Episode 4: - Getting Even

Frank Barone: Debra, what kind of con game are you running?
Marie Barone: It's your own fault, Frank. Who told you to sign up for all those things?
Frank Barone: I didn't expect to win this crap.
Debra Barone: It's not crap, Frank.
Frank Barone: Oh yeah? $80 for the use of a canoe. That is *floating* crap.
Marie Barone: Some people would consider a canoe ride romantic.
Frank Barone: Guess you didn't see "Deliverance"
03x03 - The Sitter Season 3 / Episode 3: - The Sitter

Debra Barone: You know, I don't think I'm gonna have Lisa sit for us anymore.
Ray Barone: What? No! Listen, I never think of her, ever.
Debra Barone: Uck. No, idiot. God! No, I was just thinking... I don't know, leaving the kids with a sitter so much. It just... It feels wrong.
Ray Barone: Wrong? What - it gives us more time to love each other. And if loving you is wrong... Baby, I don't want be right.
Debra Barone: Well, it just doesn't feel right to me.
Ray Barone: Come on. She's a great babysitter. It's what we always dreamed of. Come on. Look, because of her, you've got nail polish on. Don't you love that? I love it. Look at the little piggies and wee-wee-wee-wee-wee
Debra Barone: Stop it! No, you don't care about nail polish.
Debra Barone: I know, but - you wanna go back to the way it was with the kids covered in salsa and you wanting me to help? That's... I mean, that's... That's no kind of life.
Debra Barone: Yeah, but Ray, look, they are only young once. This is our only chance to enjoy this age.
Ray Barone: Well, what about my age? When do we get to enjoy my age?
Debra Barone: All right, okay. If we have to leave the kids with somebody, then you know... maybe it should be your mom. Because after all she is... family. Think of how your mom must feel with this. She comes over here and she sees Geoffrey and Michael and Ally playing with some stranger and they're having so much more fun with her than they ever had with... her
Ray Barone: Okay, okay, we'll get my mom then. Look, the bottom line is quality time, that's all. And by quality time, of course, I mean...

03x03 - The Sitter Season 3 / Episode 3: - The Sitter

Debra Barone: She is really hurt. I am such a jerk.
Ray Barone: You left some toys around. What? It happens.

Ray Barone: What? No! What? Please stop. I didn't mean *you* left them around. They got left around. Come on, the kids probably left them, the stinking kids
Debra Barone: No, Ray, it's my fault.
Ray Barone: No, no, it isn't
Debra Barone: Yes it is, 'cause I set her up. I just couldn't stand how much the kids wanted to be with Lisa. So I got your mom to babysit, so it... wouldn't go as well.
Ray Barone: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You told a perfectly nice girl not to come because you thought the kids liked her too much?
Debra Barone: Mm-hmm.
Ray Barone: And then you brought in Old Yeller to make yourself feel better?
Debra Barone: Yes. I'm terrible. I'm this evil person.
Ray Barone: I love this!
03x02 - Driving Frank Season 3 / Episode 2: - Driving Frank

Debra Barone: What happened?
Raymond "Ray" Barone: He passed!
Debra Barone: HE PASSED? J-Just the writen part.
Raymond "Ray" Barone: No. EVERYTHING. The driving, the turning, the seeing.
Debra Barone: What kind of government is THIS!
03x02 - Driving Frank Season 3 / Episode 2: - Driving Frank

Debra Barone: [astonished as Frank's renewed drivers license] The problem is he has the State of New York behind him now.
Raymond "Ray" Barone: Yeah well, they better not try to pass him cause he'll flip 'em off.
03x02 - Driving Frank Season 3 / Episode 2: - Driving Frank

Debra Barone: Ray. Listen, I've decided that I don't want Frank driving the kids anymore.
Ray Barone: What?
Debra Barone: I don't want him driving the kids. Makes me uncomfortable.
Robert Barone: Because of the swearing?
Debra Barone: Because of the driving! He's not a safe driver.
Ray Barone: Yeah, well I don't think I can tell him that he can't drive his own grandkids around.
Debra Barone: Why not? He's too aggressive.
Ray Barone: That's why I can't tell him.
02x24 - The Wedding (1) Season 2 / Episode 24: - The Wedding (1)

Ray Barone: You're already planning the wedding?
Debra Barone: I've been planning it since I was 12.
Ray Barone: But you didn't meet me until you were 22.
Debra Barone: Well, you're the last piece of the puzzle.
02x21 - Traffic School Season 2 / Episode 21: - Traffic School

Robert Barone: [as Timmy] Marie is it? Ok hi Marie. Can you tell me what you should do before backing out of the driveway?
Marie Barone: Well you fasten your seatbelt.
Robert Barone: Okay?
Marie Barone: You check your mirrors.
Robert Barone: Correct.
Marie Barone: You look to the left and to the right. You look behind you.
Robert Barone: Anything else?
Marie Barone: No I think that's it.
Robert Barone: Oh you think that's it? She thinks that's it
Robert Barone: [he begins to talk as himself] Isn't that everything Timmy?
Robert Barone: [as Timmy] Oh sure that's it except making sure your first born child is in the car before you pull out of a gas station in New Mexico!
Ray Barone: I don't know. That's awfully specific.
Marie Barone: Robbie that was thirty years ago.
Robert Barone: [as himself] I don't have a problem with it.
Debra Barone: Uh-oh.
02x16 - The Checkbook Season 2 / Episode 16: - The Checkbook

Debra Barone: Ray, when you're on the Titanic, you load the lifeboats, you don't stop to yell at the iceberg.
02x15 - Marie's Meatballs Season 2 / Episode 15: - Marie's Meatballs

Debra Barone: All I'm saying is that given everything I do around here, why do I care so much that I can't make meatballs for my husband as good as his mother?
Ray Barone: Because you're a good wife.
Debra Barone: Don't you ever, ever call me that again.
02x13 - Civil War Season 2 / Episode 13: - Civil War

Debra Barone: What am I going to tell Tom and Maryann?

Raymond "Ray" Barone: Frankly my dear... I don't give a damn.

Debra Barone: Idiot.
02x12 - All I Want for Christmas Season 2 / Episode 12: - All I Want for Christmas

Ally Barone: Daddy, what's an appointment?
Raymond "Ray" Barone: Well honey, an appointment is when two people decide to meet.
Debra Barone: Like going to the dentist.
Ally Barone: Oh.
Raymond "Ray" Barone: So, sleeping with me is like going to the dentist?
Debra Barone: Well, we both say the same things. "Sit back, relax, you won't feel a thing".
02x11 - The Letter Season 2 / Episode 11: - The Letter

Debra Barone: Um did you guys get the...
Robert Barone: Mail? Oh yeah.
Debra Barone: Ray did everybody read that?
Frank Barone: You're my favorite writer!
02x11 - The Letter Season 2 / Episode 11: - The Letter

Debra Barone: Marie I think you misunderstood the purpose of that letter.
Marie Barone: I think I understood it very well. According to you I'm intrusive, critical
Frank Barone: Overbearing
02x11 - The Letter Season 2 / Episode 11: - The Letter

Debra Barone: [after everyone leaves her party early] This is not what I wanted!
Marie Barone: Of course it isn't dear. Nobody *wants* to throw a bad party.
02x11 - The Letter Season 2 / Episode 11: - The Letter

Frank Barone: It's a whole bag of nighties...
Debra Barone: No, Frank that's... It's for a game.
Frank Barone: I'm in!
02x11 - The Letter Season 2 / Episode 11: - The Letter

Helen: Ok, for more free tupperware, it's time to play, "Guess Who's Nightie?" Did everybody put their nightie in the bag?
Debra Barone: Yes, Ma'am.
Amy MacDougall: Yes.
Marie Barone: No. I didn't bring one. I wasn't told about the party.
Helen: Well, why don't you pick first?
Marie Barone: Ok.

Gayle: I guess Amy.
Debra Barone: Yes!
Marie Barone: Amy? No.
Amy MacDougall: Well, I never wear it.

Amy MacDougall: Actually, I bought it special for this game. Really. Robert's never seen it!
02x10 - High School Season 2 / Episode 10: - High School

Debra Barone: Ray, the kids have to be picked up soon. Can you go get them?
Ray Barone: I just sat down.
Debra Barone: What are you, 80?
Ray Barone: What are you doing?
Debra Barone: I'm sorting the catalogs.
Ray Barone: Oh, God's work.
Debra Barone: Come on, one of us has to go.
Ray Barone: You go.
Debra Barone: I *always* go, Ray.

Marie Barone: Watch your step, Frank.
Ray Barone: All right, I'll go.
Debra Barone: No, I'll go.
02x10 - High School Season 2 / Episode 10: - High School

Debra Barone: Oh look, "The Eagles Return To The Nest"
Ray Barone: Yeah, we were the eagles. Now where are the bald eagles?
02x07 - Working Late Again Season 2 / Episode 7: - Working Late Again

Debra Barone: You know, your mother was right!
Raymond "Ray" Barone: Oh, that's crazy talk.
02x05 - Golf Season 2 / Episode 5: - Golf

Ray Barone: After golfing we were in the locker room and I got this weird feeling.
Debra Barone: Ray, you are not gay.
02x05 - Golf Season 2 / Episode 5: - Golf

Ray Barone: Deb, where are you?
Debra Barone: I'm up here. In the bedroom.
Ray Barone: Where are the kids?
Debra Barone: They're at Linda's house.
Ray Barone: Good. Come down will you? I want to talk to you.
Debra Barone: I think you might want to come up.
Ray Barone: It's 3:00. It can't be sex. Come down, will ya?
Debra Barone: All right, but I'll have to put clothes on.
Ray Barone: Coming up.
02x05 - Golf Season 2 / Episode 5: - Golf

Marie Barone: I know this has been hard on you honey. And you're doing everything you can for Raymond. But maybe the way you can help him relax is very simple.
Debra Barone: What do you mean?
Marie Barone: Well, I couldn't help wondering, dear... are you making yourself available to him? You know what I'm talking about?
Debra Barone: Please, Marie!
Marie Barone: Listen, you know Raymond doesn't like to ask for things.
Debra Barone: Do we have to talk about this?
Marie Barone: I'm just trying to help.
Debra Barone: I didn't say anything when you told me how Ray liked his underwear folded, but this is over the line.
Marie Barone: I'm sorry, but Raymond needs your help. Debra, you... Have a glass of wine first!
02x03 - Brother Season 2 / Episode 3: - Brother

Marie Barone: Your father's over there right now, trying to snap him out of it.
Debra Barone: Oh, what's he doing?
Marie Barone: He's yelling "Snap out of it!"
02x02 - Father Knows Least Season 2 / Episode 2: - Father Knows Least

Debra Barone: Don't try that Active Listening with me! Where you do get off listening to me?
Ray Barone: Never happen again.
01x22 - Why Are We Here? Season 1 / Episode 22: - Why Are We Here?

Debra Barone: I never thought I'd miss our little apartment.
Ray Barone: C'mon, that apartment was tiny and cramped and noisy.
Debra Barone: Yeah, your parents would only visit once every other month.
Ray Barone: I loved that place.
Debra Barone: Yeah, I know.
01x21 - Fascinatin' Debra Season 1 / Episode 21: - Fascinatin' Debra

Debra Barone: Alright, I know, I'm boring. But maybe I would be fascinating if I barged into people's houses 50 times a day.

Debra Barone: Ooh, hello, dear. What's this? Frosting in a can, so much easier than homemade. Look in that refrigerator. Whoa, smells like there wasn't anything good in here for a while.

Debra Barone: Time for desert. Holy crap. I'm not listening anymore, doo dah, doo dah...

Debra Barone: Oh, everything's turning out perfect for Raymond.

Debra Barone: Oh, lucky Raymond. Everybody loves Raymond. EVERYBODY loves Raymond. EVERYBODY LOVES Raymond. EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND!

Robert Barone: Do me, now.

Previous: Raymond Next: Robert Barone
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