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Abner Kravitz Bewitched

Abner Kravitz

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  Played by:
George TobiasGeorge Tobias
George[b] [/b]Tobias (July 14, 1901 – February 27, 1980) was an American actor. Born to a Jewish ...

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Abner Kravitz Quotes

02x12 - A Strange Little Visitor Season 2 / Episode 12: - A Strange Little Visitor

Gladys Kravitz: [Gladys and Abner observe the Stephens house] Hey, Abner. Abner, come here quick. How about that? Kind of funny, people like that going into the Stephens' house.
Abner Kravitz: They look normal to me.
Gladys Kravitz: That's what's funny about it.
02x11 - Aunt Clara's Old Flame Season 2 / Episode 11: - Aunt Clara's Old Flame

Gladys Kravitz: [complaining as Abner is playing a flute] Abner, I'm telling you, I saw it with my own eyes. A funny, little old... Will you stop playing that flute and listen to me?
Abner Kravitz: I've listened. Twelve times already.
Gladys Kravitz: She walked right into the wall and bounced off again! So any reasonable person would figure it was an accident, right?
Abner Kravitz: But what did you think, Gladys?
Gladys Kravitz: An accident the first time. Then she did it again. Bang, right into the wall and bounced off again. And I thought: "Why would anyone wanna bang against a wall?".
Abner Kravitz: Simple. It feels so good when you stop.
Gladys Kravitz: The next time she went right through the wall!
Abner Kravitz: Well, that makes sense.
Gladys Kravitz: What?
Abner Kravitz: Well, there's no point in banging your head against a brick wall.
Gladys Kravitz: I'm beginning to realize that, Abner. I'm beginning to realize that.
02x11 - Aunt Clara's Old Flame Season 2 / Episode 11: - Aunt Clara's Old Flame

Gladys Kravitz: [looks into a dictionary, reads] "Warlock:... Sorcerer, wizard". Abner. There's a wizard at the Stephen's home.
Abner Kravitz: It's good for the lawn. It eats the mosquitoes.
Gladys Kravitz: Not a lizard, a wizard.
Abner Kravitz: Wizard, lizard, as long as it eats the mosquitoes.
02x11 - Aunt Clara's Old Flame Season 2 / Episode 11: - Aunt Clara's Old Flame

Abner Kravitz: See, I told you there's a logical explanation for everything.
Gladys Kravitz: I suppose there's also a logical explanation for dancing flowers.
Abner Kravitz: Gladys, will you stop.
02x06 - Take Two Aspirin Season 2 / Episode 6: - Take Two Aspirin

Abner Kravitz: Gladys, you were born a hundred years too late.
Gladys Kravitz: What do you mean by that?
Abner Kravitz: You'd have made a great town crier.
02x06 - Take Two Aspirin Season 2 / Episode 6: - Take Two Aspirin

Gladys Kravitz: You think I ought to take over some of my chicken soup?
Abner Kravitz: No.
Gladys Kravitz: Why not?
Abner Kravitz: There's a city ordinance against poisoning people.
02x06 - Take Two Aspirin Season 2 / Episode 6: - Take Two Aspirin

Gladys Kravitz: Square green spots all over her face, Abner. What do you think of that?
Abner Kravitz: So?
Gladys Kravitz: How can you be so calm? Nobody ever had square green spots before.
Abner Kravitz: Nobody ever had your chicken soup before.
02x06 - Take Two Aspirin Season 2 / Episode 6: - Take Two Aspirin

Gladys Kravitz: [talking about Samantha] I bet she has some strange disease, and we could catch it. Abner, you wanna wake up with something strange?
Abner Kravitz: I've been doing that for twenty years. Why change now?
Gladys Kravitz: Very funny.
02x01 - Alias Darrin Stephens Season 2 / Episode 1: - Alias Darrin Stephens

Gladys Kravitz: Abner, I whipped up a batch of my icebox cookies. Now I'm going over and give some to Mr. and Mrs. Stephens.
Abner Kravitz: Why do you want to inflict suffering on such a nice couple?
Gladys Kravitz: My icebox cookies are very unusual.
Abner Kravitz: I know. You make them out of real iceboxes.
02x01 - Alias Darrin Stephens Season 2 / Episode 1: - Alias Darrin Stephens

Gladys Kravitz: [after finding Darrin, the chimpanzee] I wonder where he belongs?
Abner Kravitz: He belongs in a zoo. And so do you.
02x01 - Alias Darrin Stephens Season 2 / Episode 1: - Alias Darrin Stephens

Abner Kravitz: Take your medicine, Gladys.
01x33 - A Change of Face Season 1 / Episode 33: - A Change of Face

Gladys Kravitz: Abner, believe me, there was a strange lady driving their car.
Abner Kravitz: There's only one strange lady around here, Gladys.
01x32 - Illegal Separation Season 1 / Episode 32: - Illegal Separation

Abner Kravitz: I said, "Gladys, let me in, I'll catch pneumonia".
Samantha Stephens: And she didn't answer?
Abner Kravitz: She answered. She gave me the name of a good doctor.
01x32 - Illegal Separation Season 1 / Episode 32: - Illegal Separation

Samantha Stephens: Would you care to join us in a glass of champagne?
Abner Kravitz: Thanks, but not at bedtime.
Samantha Stephens: Oh, all right, Mr. Kravitz. The guest room is the first door to the left, on the top of the stairs.
Abner Kravitz: At bedtime, I drink piping hot cocoa. If it's not too much trouble.
01x32 - Illegal Separation Season 1 / Episode 32: - Illegal Separation

Abner Kravitz: That was the best sleep I've had in months. Mrs. Kravitz snores.
01x31 - That Was My Wife Season 1 / Episode 31: - That Was My Wife

Gladys Kravitz: [Gladys is wearing a blonde wig] Abner, I want you to look at me.
Abner Kravitz: So, I'm looking.
Gladys Kravitz: But you're not seeing me. You haven't really looked at me in years.
Abner Kravitz: I don't have to. I already committed you to memory.
Gladys Kravitz: [wanting him to notice her hair] Abner, don't you notice something different?
Abner Kravitz: [looks her up and down and notices her shoes] Oh, you bought new shoes?
01x31 - That Was My Wife Season 1 / Episode 31: - That Was My Wife

Gladys Kravitz: You've had your nose stuck in that book all day.
Abner Kravitz: I wanna see how it turns out.
Gladys Kravitz: It's about The Civil War. The North won!
Abner Kravitz: Let me find out for myself, huh?
Samantha Stephens: There's nothing wrong with being interested in two women. As long as they're both your wife.
01x31 - That Was My Wife Season 1 / Episode 31: - That Was My Wife

Gladys Kravitz: Abner, don't you ever think of romance anymore?
Abner Kravitz: Gladys, please. I'm retired!
Gladys Kravitz: That's wonderful! I thought you didn't care, but you're only color blind!
01x29 - Abner Kadabra Season 1 / Episode 29: - Abner Kadabra

Samantha Stephens: [after Mrs. Kravitz calls] You'd better go home.
Abner Kravitz: What is it?
Samantha Stephens: She thinks she's getting vibrations.
Abner Kravitz: Vibrations? She's chewing on the electric blanket again.
01x28 - Open the Door Witchcraft Season 1 / Episode 28: - Open the Door Witchcraft

Abner Kravitz: [Mrs. Kravitz wheels her shopping trolley through the glass of an Out Of Order door] Are you alright?
Gladys Kravitz: I think so.
Abner Kravitz: Didn't you read the sign? This door is "Out Of Order".
Gladys Kravitz: Not for Samantha Stephens, it isn't. How is that, Abner? Tell me. Please explain it to me!
Abner Kravitz: I'll explain it to you. You're out of order!
01x28 - Open the Door Witchcraft Season 1 / Episode 28: - Open the Door Witchcraft

Gladys Kravitz: [Samantha twitches her nose to open her garage door] Abner, did you see that? She opened the garage door.
Abner Kravitz: So what do you want me to do? Applaud?
Gladys Kravitz: No, no, she opened it, no hands, nothing! She just sat there!
Abner Kravitz: Why don't you stop. They probably got an electric door like they demonstrated down at the market.
Gladys Kravitz: I don't believe it. She opens doors without electricity. Somebody ought to tell the electric company. They're loosing a bundle.
Abner Kravitz: I'm loosing a bundle on you. I have to pay for a glass door. Eye glasses, lessons on how to read would be cheaper.
Gladys Kravitz: All right. Go ahead and joke. I'm telling you, she's strange.
Abner Kravitz: She's strange? You're strange?
Gladys Kravitz: So prove it!
Abner Kravitz: Prove you're strange?
Gladys Kravitz: Prove they've got an electric door!
Abner Kravitz: How?
Gladys Kravitz: Go over and ask them!
Abner Kravitz: I will. Tonight I'll go.
Gladys Kravitz: Why do you have to wait until tonight?
Abner Kravitz: Because if I have to look like an idiot, I'd rather do it in the dark!
01x28 - Open the Door Witchcraft Season 1 / Episode 28: - Open the Door Witchcraft

Gladys Kravitz: [Abner is playing his flute] Shh... They'll hear you?
Abner Kravitz: Well, I've got nothing to hide.
Gladys Kravitz: I do. I don't want them peaking over here, while I'm spying on them. So don't play.
01x25 - Pleasure O'Reilly Season 1 / Episode 25: - Pleasure O'Reilly

Gladys Kravitz: She doesn't look like our kind of people.
Abner Kravitz: She looks like my kind of people.
01x25 - Pleasure O'Reilly Season 1 / Episode 25: - Pleasure O'Reilly

Thor Swenson: [looking for Pleasure O'Reilly] I've only got one question for you. Do you have Pleasure in this house?
Abner Kravitz: Well, not too often, but occasionally.
01x24 - Which Witch is Which? Season 1 / Episode 24: - Which Witch is Which?

Gladys Kravitz: How would you feel if I invited one of my boyfriends to dinner?
Abner Kravitz: Fine, just make sure he can play pinochle.
01x23 - Red Light, Green Light Season 1 / Episode 23: - Red Light, Green Light

Dave: Alright then, we're all agreed. We've got to do something of a dramatic nature to show City Hall we want some action.
Gladys Kravitz: I say we should lie down right in the middle of the street.
Abner Kravitz: You lie down right in the middle of the street. The traffic's too heavy for me.
Dave: I'm afraid Mrs. Kravitz, that's illegal. We could arrested.
Abner Kravitz: We could get killed.
01x23 - Red Light, Green Light Season 1 / Episode 23: - Red Light, Green Light

Abner Kravitz: Here Gladys, have a cookie. You've been working too hard!
01x23 - Red Light, Green Light Season 1 / Episode 23: - Red Light, Green Light

Mayor: You elected me Mayer to do the right thing for all people. Didn't you?
Abner Kravitz: Personally I supported your opponent.
01x21 - Ling Ling Season 1 / Episode 21: - Ling Ling

Abner Kravitz: [giving her a spoonful of medicine] Here Gladys. I thought I'd be prepared this time.
01x16 - It's Magic Season 1 / Episode 16: - It's Magic

Gladys Kravitz: I don't understand it. Samantha's gotta be around here somewhere.
Abner Kravitz: What do you think? The magicians gonna pull her out of his hat.

Previous: Darrin Stephens (2) Next: Gladys Kravitz
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